“I love daisies too,” she told him several nights after they first met. She wasn’t sure why she blurted it out but it seemed the normal thing to say considering the conversation they were having. They were talking about “favorite things” the way you do when you are trying to get to know someone. Small talk that keeps the conversation flowing:

“My favorite color is green, 18 is my lucky number, and my favorite food is pizza.” When she jokingly asked if he had a favorite flower he replied, “Nope, but my mom loves daisies.” She brightened up immediately because daisies have long been one of her favorites and she was impressed that he knew what type of flower his mother liked the best.

They began to spend more and more time with each other until their relationship seemed like a night in August; hot and steamy. Before long wedding bells rang and the happy couple started their lives together as man and wife.

He loved to bring flowers home, usually roses but occasionally he would bring home mixed flowers or carnations. He never needed a holiday or special occasion, he did it because her expression never changed, she was always genuinely surprised by his thoughtfulness.

As with many marriages, it wasn’t long before their home was filled with the cries of a baby; a baby boy named after his father. Many floral arrangements were sent to the happy mother to celebrate the birth of her child, including two dozen long stemmed roses with a card that read, “Thank you for our son, I will always love you!”

The baby grew up quickly and before his parents could believe it, he was celebrating his fifth birthday. On the day of his birthday, the father pulled his son aside before his party started to have a “father~son” talk with him. The mother noticed and just smiled because she thought her husband was reminding their son to behave and be a good boy at the party.

The party was fun for everyone that attended, young and old alike. After the presents were opened, the little boy turned to his mother and said, “Mommy, I have a present for you too.”

He walked out of the room and returned almost instantly with a gigantic bouquet of daisy flowers. His mother couldn’t believe her eyes and she wondered how her little boy could have possibly known that she loved daisies. It was then that she remembered the “father~son” talk earlier in the day.

She turned to her husband and asked, “How did you ever remember?” He smiled and replied, “Your favorite number is 18, you love the color green and pizza is your favorite food, right?” “Right, but you have given me flowers so many times and you have never, not once given me daisies,” she continued, “I just thought you had forgotten after so many years.”

He just smiled and said, “The moment you told me your favorite flower, I knew our son would give you daisies on his fifth birthday.” She looked confused so he continued, ” I gave my mother daisies for the first time on the day I turned five too!”

“The first time?” she asked. “Yup, my father pulled me aside on the day of my fifth birthday and I have given daisies to my mother every year since.” Now his wife was genuinely shocked. “You have given your mother daisies every year since you have been five?”

“Yes, I do it because I love her and I am happy that she is my mother,” he answered. With surprise in her voice she asked, “How come you never told me that you did such a thoughtful thing for your mom?” “Simple,” he said, “I didn’t want to ruin your surprise!”

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It happened again!

I was enjoying an evening with my little 2-yr. old son at the playground when, BAM, it happened. You ever have one of those moments in life when you know you are being taught an important lesson?

Picture in your mind a chaotic atmosphere of over fifty little children battling for their turn to play on a handful of playground rides and objects.

Recipe for disaster, huh? That’s what I thought, too, until my observations quickly picked up something else.

Sure, they were running into one another, crying and trying to get ahead of each other for the rides. They were walking across other children who had fallen down in front of them and were pushing one another to get their turn. They were running to their parents for comfort after getting their feelings hurt.

As I stood there taking in the scenery before me, those little blessings of life showed me some important lessons about relationship success. If you will indulge me a moment, I will share with you what I found out.

Relationship Success Lesson #1 - The Principle of Fun:

Not much to say here! It’s simple; these kids loved to have fun.

In adult relationships, life throws curves at us constantly. Responsibilities come at us from every angle. It takes conscious effort to remember to have fun together in life. I emphasize the word, “together”. I’m not talking about the type of fun where the husband plays golf and the wife shops.

The “heavy” takes it toll on relationships, and we do well when we give our relationship a time-out from the heavy and lighten up. Couples who play together, stay together.

Relationship Success Lesson #2 - The Principle of Fascination:

As I stood there watching, it was interesting to see how the younger children reacted to the older kids. It didn’t take much observance to see that they were taken by and fascinated with them.

Fascination! While it is not a word often associated with relationship success, if you want thriving relationships, you may just want to give it some precedence.

I was blessed earlier in life to have a couple who had been married over twenty-six years model this for me. Whenever anyone saw them together, they were holding hands and playfully giddy as if they had just started dating. When I asked what caused her to be this much in love with a man after so many years of marriage, she responded, “He fascinates me.”

Let that sink in a moment.

Are you an interesting person? Would you consider yourself intriguing? Do you have interests in life that cause other people to want to be around you, or are you often bored?

A few things to note:

* Bored people are boring people.

* Having interests will help make us more fascinating in life.

* In the world of relationship enrichment, “Couch Potatoes Need Not Apply”.

Relationship Success Lesson #3 - The Principle of Forgiveness:

As I stood and watched, two children were running on the playground in opposite directions, and I saw it coming before they did. They each circled the same object until they literally met in the middle. Two more kids came around and did the same thing.

Tempers flared, emotions ran high, tears ran down their cheeks and feelings were hurt. Less than two minutes later, they were off running and playing together, and all was forgotten.

What would happen in adult relationships if we learned how to do that? Instead of internalizing everything, we learn not to take it all so personally. Instead of holding grudges, we learn to hold hands.

Children have soft hearts - life can sometimes harden them.

Sheds a little light on the phrase, “Except you become like little children”, doesn’t it?

Stanley J. Leffew is the Author of, “How To Be Wanted For a Lifetime of Nights and Not Just a Night of a Lifetime”. His website is based on this same theme. Find out for yourself why feeding desire and leading-with-the-body in life and relationships fails to satisfy the longing of the human heart to connect at http://advice-for-lifetime-relationships.com.

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