Humor has long been considered one of the most effective tools to judge the quality of any relationship. If there is laughter present you can assume that the relationship is a healthy one. When the laughter ceases you can be quite certain that the relationship is on the down slide. This laughter barometer can be applied to any relationship at home, at work and at play. Laughter means that you’re having fun and fun means that things are going well.. Take a look at the relationships around you. Do the couples laugh a lot together? Has the laughter stopped in some of your relationships?

Here are a few ideas you can use to make certain that laughter remains an ever present reality in your relationships thus ensuring their quality and endurance. Remember introducing humor to previously humorless relationships might take time but the results will be worth the effort. Start slowly by working on your own fun loving, cheery disposition. Laughter and humor are contagious so it won’t be long before others catch the bug.

* Remember that a sense of humor is learned, not inherited.

* Commit to becoming a humor hound. Look for humor everywhere. When something strikes you funny enjoy it. Let the laughter flow. After the funny event has passed recall it and enjoy it and laugh again.

* Begin to cultivate an atmosphere of humor and laughter in your relationships. Try to enjoy and share humor as often as you can.

* If you don ‘t laugh as much as you used to and want to correct the situation start associating with humorous, fun loving people and avoid the downers.

* Learn to laugh at yourself. If you don’t, you leave the job to others.

* Look for funny items in your newspaper and cut them out and share them. I recall reading the want ads one night and discovered this gem : ” The successful applicant should have 203 years experience.” Obviously the writer meant to say 2 or 3 years experience. I immediately cut it out and placed it in my collection for future use.

* Encourage others to share their humor. Listen and appreciate it when they do. When someone sees that you have enjoyed their humorous contribution they will be eager to continue sharing.

* In my full day humor workshops I always ask the participants to break up into groups and begin sharing the funniest thing that has ever happened to them. The laughter that this simple activity generates is a joy to behold. Try this will your friends sometime.

* Collect cartoons and jokes and put them on display on the fridge or the bulletin board. Make sure to avoid racist, sexist or filthy humor. The is plenty of good clean humor to go around without resorting to these. Remember that there is a difference between dirty and earthy humor. I personally like earthy humor. I don’t appreciate dirty material.

* Watch comedy movies and television programs as often a possible.

* Use humor to neutralize conflict in your relationships. When things get tense use self deprecating humor to lighten things up. I remember one evening having an argument with my wife, Carol. In the heat of the moment she said something totally out of character. She said something hurtful. In my surprise I looked at her and said, ” Carol, when you say things like that you stoop to my level.” She started to laugh and so did I. It wasn’t long before things were back to normal.

Good luck on your journey to HA HA Land.

Mike Moore is an international speaker/ writer/ cartoonist on Humor and Stress Management and Humor in the Workplace. Visit him at http://www.motivationalplus.com http://www.motivationalplus.com/cartoons.html

Mike Moore is an international speaker on Humor and Stress Management, Humor in the Workplace, and Humor and Relationships. His articles and cartoons have appeared in publications throughout Canada and the USA.

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Breaking up.

The End. The journey is over. You feel rejected. Hopeless. You don’t want to go back in the jungle again. You may even have that dread feeling of failure.

Suddenly, all the love songs at the radio seemed to have been written for you. You want to stay in bed. Shut all the doors and the windows. Bring the kids to your relatives for a while. You don’t feel like talking to anybody now. You swear to yourself that you will never get involved with someone again, half believing it.

Life is much more exciting than that. Besides, you are not the last and only person experiencing a separation. And, it might not be your last breakup either. With the proper mental tools, break ups could be less painful.

Breaking up, I prefer to call it an opportunity for a change of habits. It’s like having an addiction and you need to cut yourself from it. It’s painful but necessary. The good news about it is that it doesn’t need to be Hell on Earth. There are effective ways to go through this process with smooth sailing.

First, you absolutely need to stop thinking of the great moments that you had together. Chances are that those moments happened a long time ago, not to mention, not that often either. Keep in mind the reasons of your break up, until your mind is in sync with your heart. And don’t keep in touch with that person for now, if you can. Or reduce the frequency of contacts at its bare minimum.

Write a letter

You need to let the emotions out. Write everything that frustrates you, made you angry, sad, etc… You don’t necessarily need to send it to your previous partner but at least, this is a proven healing process for you to calm the storm inside. You can choose to keep it somewhere to read for yourself later, when the healing process will be over. You might discover some strength that you are not aware about you.

Make new friends.

You need to socialize more the ever. How do you do that? Go to fairs, reading clubs, sports clubs, art clubs, etc… ask questions, make conversations, and exchange phone numbers with people to do activities and keep in touch. Offer to help with something. Friends come fast like that. Don’t jump into another relationship to avoid facing your feelings of emptiness. Chances are that there will be other disappointments. You need to finish the process of unblocking all of your emotions to freely open your heart again to someone else, and increase the chances of success.

Pamper yourself.

Treat yourself. Take naps in the Sun. Get a pedicure. A great massage. Read the bible. Read inspiring texts that will give you strength ( Like the book “Chicken soup for Soul”). Go jogging. Do someYoga. Listen to Jazz music. Eat well. Go pick apples with the kids. You know what I mean; do all the activities that help put your soul to calm.

Stay away from unsupportive people

Neutralized your mind and heart from some comments of your family and friends. I am sure that they really want your good. But they maybe are a little bit …. “clumsy” in the way they express their caring for you ” When are you going the get married? You can’t go from people to people like that! You are getting old, you know?” or ” There are other people you know; 1 lost, 10 found!” (I hate that one). Hang out with people who are taking your mind off things, who understands and gives you the support that you need. I remember reading this about hardships that ” It is not only time that heals the heart, but also all the warmth and love around us.”

Get a Pet

When I broke up with my last boyfriend, I got a cat. He was so tiny and requested so much of my attention that it fulfilled my need to feel wanted. A pet doesn’t replace the love and attention that a boyfriend or girlfriend can give, but, it’s all part of the process of having a full life. So get a dog, a cat, a turtle, whatever provides that added value in your life.

Find at least 3 Passions

You will need to get all the strength that you can possibly have to open your heart to fun. Fill your life to the fullest with different passions.

Take cooking lessons, join travel single groups to Hawaii resorts, try other sports, and try painting, other arts, and hobbies of some kind. Learning a new thing will keep your mind busy, you will have a new skill and will feel good about yourself and, you will be more interesting for a future mate.

One of my friends was single for at least 2 years. She decided to join a badminton club. The first semester, nobody was really interesting for her. In the second semester, there was still no new blood coming. But she still subscribed because she enjoyed the activity so much. The third semester, this dark handsome policeman join the league and it didn’t take long before they hooked up. And today, they share, among other things, this passion. It’s an opportunity to have fun together and to be together.

Date Again.

Yes! You read right! Date again! Jump right back on the Horse again! You need to rebuild your self-esteem and being in situations where people from the opposite sex find you interesting will prevent that you go down into that whole. You don’t need to get deeply emotionally involved. Date to have fun. Keep the relationships light and simple. Where do you find those people? Go on dating sites, classifieds, friends, and acquaintances. Since you are not out to find a husband and wife yet, you won’t be threatening.

Get to the stage of feeling great being single

Take the time to Truly feel fulfilled in a single life. This is a powerful way to find true love because if you are having a great life alone, you will be willing give up your exciting single lifestyle for the person that is really worth it.

Be and Feel Successful

And if you are out for revenge the greatest revenge of all is Success. Take this opportunity to develop your personality even more. Your children, if you have, will be proud of you and people around you will admire your strength and more opportunities will occur.

If you were to consider coming back with your partner, start considering it not before 6 months to a year after the break up. This has given time to you and your partner to reflect on your mutual faults and strengths, and to heal.

Experiencing loss is a difficult moment of our life to pass. But you can take this opportunity to prove to yourself, once again, how much of a winner you are; take this opportunity to transform yourself even more. If you transform your life while you are not in a relationship, with a partner, you will collect the fruits of these initiatives.

The most important thing: laugh, laugh, and laugh. Laugh at every opportunity that life gives you. Feel good and be happy.

Wishing you great success in finding happiness again.

Who is Caroline? She is a growing expert on love, relationship, romance because she is reading extensively on the subject. She is gladly sharing her knowledge and experience. To continue receiving tips on how to get the love life that you want, you can subscribe free to her newsletter at http://www.everydaybetterliving.com

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